It's Not About You! Choose What's Right for Your Bear and Its Future Bestie

HEY, THERE!

It’s Week 5 of the Simple Bear Necessities series and this issue is packed.

PACKED, I tell you.

With all the questions you need to ask and the mindset that matters on the road to choosing the right fabric for your bear AND its human bestie.

So let’s cut to the chase.

Next up in this issue:

• Mindset over fabric matters

• Remembering Snowy, a bear who “stood the test of time”

• Bears as sleep aids 

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DEEP DIVE
MINDSET OVER FABRIC MATTERS

Three elements go into building the trifecta of connection that turns a heart-made bear into a Plushie Powerhouse: 

• How the bear looks 

• What it says 

• How it feels

When we're talking looks . . .

• It's the coat.  

• It’s the fabric. 

• It’s the pattern (and color).

Sometimes, the outfit makes the bear.

But even then, the bear’s coat gives the outfit the proper backdrop so it can shine. 

Remember last week? I said I see all fabric in teddy bear form? 

Here’s what that looks like in the Fur-ever Friend Flesh.

Oh, and let’s be clear.

I’m not against monochromatic bears. 

As long as they have Pooh personality and charm, we’re cool.

But before we get to the charm, we have choices to make. 

Tough choices.

Just because the fabric is fun or fluffy, doesn’t make it right for your bear.

Since Week One of this series, I’ve been saying you’re making a WHO, not a what.

The mindset matters because you must answer three key questions BEFORE you start building your bear. 

• WHO is it for? 

• WHO could it be? 

• WHO could it help?

These will help you choose the right fabric and then analyze it to ensure it's the best fit for the bear AND the person receiving it.

WHO IS IT FOR? 

So, who will be the lucky person getting a new bear bestie?

Is it an infant, a toddler or a teen? 

Is it an adult friend or family member? 

If it's for a child: safety first. 

Watch for shedding with the fur when you pull it. It’s a choking hazard. 

The shedding can be a problem for adults, too. Especially if they have allergies or pets that may get a hold of the bear.  

The same goes for woven patterns that unravel.

If a seam pops or rips, the strands can become safety hazards for babies and toddlers prone to putting things in their mouths. 

WHO COULD IT BE?

Next up: who this bear could be to its human bestie.

Is it a snuggle buddy? A hug therapist? 

How often this bear will be in play, factors into the fabric choice. 

Is it something that needs to be soft and squishy? 

Should it have arms that move? Because if you've got a bear with joints, you need fabric that can handle the repetitive movement of said joints.

Plastic, safety joints OR homemade. 

Yes, you CAN make your own joints with cardboard, screws and washers.  

I did it for years. 

But plastic joints are the best safety option because they lock in place.

Period.  

You can't get 'em off. 

Side note: It’s all good on the safety front, until you put an arm on backwards. Then you’re building a new bear. 

WHO COULD THIS HELP?

Lastly, we’re asking who this bear could help. 

Is it a grieving spouse or a friend?

Maybe it’s a buddy for a lonely teen? 

The answers will mean the difference between shopping at the fabric store or in someone's closet. 

If a child lost a parent, the best fabric may be their dad’s favorite shirt. 

BUILDING A BEAR FROM THE CLOTHES OF SOMEONE THEY LOVED AND LOST MAKES THOSE SHIRT-INSPIRED MEMORIES HUGGABLE.

A memory bear is a creative way to love the deceased out loud, instead of boxing up the things that made them present - like their clothes. 

If someone needs cheering up, you could go bold with unexpected fabrics to help boost their mood and make them smile. 

What about someone who likes things that feel a certain way? 

If fur is a hard NO, alternatives are in order. 

Chenille fabric, which is made from twisted yarn, is one option. 

It’s durable, super soft and easy to work with.

But beware: If the bear will be in direct sunlight for long periods of time, the color will fade. 

Other faux fur alternatives include: 

• Cotton 

• Velour

• Flannel

• Denim

• Wool

• Calico

• Velvet

As with carpet, the pile or height of certain fabrics vary. 

Velvet has a short, thick pile that’s luxurious instead of irritating like some furs.

Patchwork and upholstery fabrics offer creative alternatives, too. 

Whatever you choose, don’t just stick to the bolts of fabric on the full-price shelves.

Dig into the sale bins and remnant piles.

You’ll find high end, durable fabrics in smaller swatches at more reasonable prices. 

TEXTURE TIDBITS

Circling back to fabrics with texture, you’ll find bears made from:

• Synthetic faux fur

• Mohair (Fleece of the Angora goat)

• Alpaca (Wool) 

I prefer synthetic fur with a soft backing. 

If the latter is hard, sewing will be a challenge on the machine and by hand. 

Not to mention turning your bear parts inside out. 

You’ll be on the struggle bus, ready to toss everything out the window after wrestling with a stiff backing. 

Next up is mohair, which is made from the fleece of the angora goat.  

Alpaca wool comes from the alpaca.

High end artist and collectible bears are made from expensive mohair and alpaca. Synthetic fur can run high, too, depending on the length of the pile. 

(Long-haired fur costs more.)

When selecting fur, ask these questions: 

• When you brush the fur in a circular direction, does it become matted? If so, skip it. Matting should occur over time from years of hugs.

• Is the backing plastic or woven? You want woven for the softness and ease of sewing and turning.  

• Is the fur long or short? Again, consider the person. Long-haired fur makes some uncomfortable. 

• How will this work with the accent fabric? Do you want a high contrast or complementary color pairing. 

WHAT TO AVOID

Stay away from fabrics with too much stretch. 

Fleece, for example, is more of an accent fabric, not a dominant body option. 

Too much stretch means the bear won’t hold its shape when stuffed and the seams will pop. But add a splash of purple camo fleece to the ears, nose and paw pads and you have a bear with distinction.

I’m on the fence about silks and polyester.

Both can stain and you can’t send your bear to the dry cleaners. (Seriously. Please don’t.)

Silk and polyester also fray and larger needles leave permanent holes in the fabric. You have plenty of other fabric options so revisit those.

Need a recap?

Here’s the list of questions for faux fur alternatives.

• How stretchy is the fabric?

• Does it fray?

• Will it stain? 

• Can you easily pin it to other fabric? 

• When you remove the pins, do they leave holes?

Phew! 

I know. It’s a lot to consider. 

But remember: You’re building an endurance bear. 

Plus, anything heart-made is made with care. 

And your consideration for the person receiving the bear will make their meeting and connection that much stronger. 

DISPATCHES
BEEN THERE LOVED THAT

Heart-made bears are fur-ever friends, but they can be lost or damaged beyond repair. 

Snowy is one such bear. 

I made Snowy for Trish when she was pregnant. 

Back then, our hair had less gray, newspapers were still the media of record and Skype was our FaceTime. 

This was what life was like with Snowy who “stood the test of time,” Trish said.

I can't say enough about how much our handmade polar bear has meant to me and my child.

Snowy was a big part of their life, attending every tea party and teddy bear picnic adorned in the finest of fashions. 

There's nothing like a handmade teddy bear. And this one especially, was so well made. 

Almost 20 years later, Snowy has not busted one stitch. 

Sure, her fur is a little more pressed down because of all the hugs she has received over the years.

But of all the stuffed animals my child had (and believe me, they had a ton), none of them were put together with the care and masterful craftsmanship as our polar bear.

Sadly, Snowy was lost in the family’s house fire earlier this year. 

But we have plans to make a new friend. For Mom. 

And for Snowy.

“Maybe a smaller one,” Trish said.  “To commemorate her.”

 SLEEP TIGHT

You can, with a bear. 

Sleep tight, I mean. 

AmeriSleep, a mattress company, even wrote a blog about it: Benefits of Sleeping with Stuffed Animals: Enhancing Your Bedtime Routine

“For many adults, sleeping with stuffed animals goes beyond nostalgia. It’s a choice rooted in the desire for emotional well-being. The familiar presence of these cuddly companions not only aids in falling asleep faster but also contributes to a sense of security, creating a bedtime ritual that offers comfort and a touch of whimsy amid the demands of adult life, “ the article said. 

For one man posting on Reddit, a bear was the answer to his sleep problems. 

“I was actually advised to get a bear by my therapist. I suffer from depression and anxiety and have a lot of trouble sleeping,” wrote WhiteKnightPrimal.

“My therapist thought the comfort of a bear would help regulate my sleep. So, I bought one.”

“Just for context on this, I'm 37M, as well, so a lot of people would find it weird. But, for me, having a bear at night is the only thing l've ever found that helps regulate my sleep consistently.” 

“Everything else l've tried over the years either doesn't work at all or only works for a short period of time. And I refuse to take sleeping pills.”